So I’m writing this thing and I totally want people to read it. To find out if I am, in fact, brilliant. Or just humorously deluded. But when I think about actually showing what I’m working on to someone my brain goes, “Yes, but not yet… I need to do this thing first. And that thing. And… that other thing.”
So I’m looking at it, trying to figure out when ‘yet’ happens and I’ll be able to hand it over to someone and I find myself thinking instead, “Ohhh, I should this…” And then I end up writing in the middle of the night again.
So I’m wandering around in the dark, lighted only by the glow of my laptop screen, on the high of some great insight into the story, thinking, “I’m brilliant. Did you see that? Brilliant! And hilarious!” And everyone’s like ‘la la la’. Or, you know, they’re sleeping.
I don’t know. How come the rest of the world doesn’t operate on my time frame? Just because it would be ludicrous and impractical is no reason to dismiss it out of hand…
Even if Paul has started greeting me in the morning with laughter and the question: “Out of interest, how much sleep did you get?” …and then he starts telling me about the most disgusting potential origin for an apocalypse ever. (Don’t let him do this. Trust me.)
Also, apparently I keep track of the days like a very small child and if I don’t sleep the next day doesn’t actually happen. By which I mean, Friday took me completely be surprise today — the whole weekend did. Did you know it was Friday today? All day! Friday! Happening all over the place!
It was quite disorienting. But now… there is something very restful about the idea that this whole weekend thing has a tomorrow where there’s nothing I have to do. Just think about the glorious possibilities — naps, for instance.
Although I may have made a plan today to use some of it making alcohol.* Also… you know I’m going to at least spend the morning writing because… oh shut up, no I don’t have a sensible reason. Because there’s a wizard in the back of my head right now laughing uproariously. You know, like they do. Perhaps I will see if I can get him drunk. That might shut him up. At least for a while.
* Er, that is, brewing alcohol? No, that can’t be right. Cooking alcohol? Creatertating mulled wine, in any case. Cause we had some at a party last week and now I want more.
Kandace Mavrick
Paul McLaughlan
platform thing 
Jared S (@jareds)
20/08/2011
Surely one who makes mulled wine does so by mulling wine. You are a wine muller.
Sassamifrass (@sassamifrass)
20/08/2011
I’ve always done my best writing between about 10pm and 2am. I think it’s great that you’re able to be flexible enough with your time to write in the windows that suit you 🙂 Given I have insomnia most of the time anyway, maybe I should just get up and write myself rather than sitting around in the dark going come on come on come on SLEEP YOU HEARTLESS HARPY OF A BRAIN
Kandace Mavrick
20/08/2011
I KNOW. My insomnia was so much worse when I was thinking ‘every minute I’m not sleeping now is a minute tireder tomorrow and I suck and I’m never going to sleep again and I’m dooooommed’. Plus I was always thinking ‘can’t write now, must sleep’ and then when I had time to write I was exhausted and the buzz was gone and it sucked all over the place.
Plus I find that when I sit up and do something else for a while instead of trying to bludgeon my brain into sleep sometimes it’s better. …or I end up writing all night. But at least that’s more fun that destroying your bed in sleep frustration.
Claire
20/08/2011
You live in a place where people sleep at all hours of the day and night.
Shuck convention and do your own thing girl!
Kandace Mavrick
20/08/2011
Yeah, but I feel sorry for Rick who has more normal hours (I say MORE normal, because anyone who voluntarily gets up at 5.30am for work is a bit nuts in my book).
Rosemary
20/08/2011
Send it to me quick! You know I can fill in the gaps! Or ask what should go there
Rosemary
20/08/2011
Ignore the last email address. Sometimes the iPad decides to not let you edit anything.
Claire
20/08/2011
I do a lot of mulling over wine but I don’t think that makes it mulled wine, does it?
Oh and thanks for the warning but a day too late for me re Paul’s apocalypse scenario. Then he hands me a book called “Infected” with the tag line “When you hear the voices it’s already too late.”
So, no sleep for me either. Just sheet hugging terror at every subcutaneous itch.
Kandace Mavrick
20/08/2011
Sorry! I try to protect the world from these things but… he’s incorrigible. I think he’s TRYING to give people nightmares.
shig
21/08/2011
I do this, but for programming.
It’s like “JUST ONE MORE LEVEL!”, but with usability.
Kandace Mavrick
21/08/2011
It’s totally reasonable and not at all crazy!
hotshot bald cop
03/09/2011
I agree 100%